Let's Make This Legal!

You have your venue, your rings, and your flowers…..but let’s make sure we make your marriage legal! Here are some tips from local minister, Ken Craft, to ensure you have everything you need for your big day!

There are 2 licenses in California....

License #1 is the public license and issued by the county recorder/clerks office only. It requires one witness (though most people do 2 witnesses). It can be issued in any county and taken to any county in California. It is the officiating party's responsibility to return it to the issuing county after the ceremony within 10 days. This license becomes public record.

License #2 is called the CA License and Certificate of Confidential Marriage. It can be issued by the county recorder/clerk's office or by a Notary Public authorized by the recorder/ clerk in that county. The licensed must be used in the county of issue ONLY. The requirements are: Be over 18. Must be an unmarried man and an unmarried woman. The couple must be living together as husband and wife. This license becomes confidential and is NOT public record. No witnesses required.

The correct ID would be a valid driver's license/ or ID card issued by the DMV, a valid passport, a valid military ID. These have the correct name, photo, the signature, and birthdate. Birth certificates are not valid ID.

Some counties recommend bringing certified copies of your birth certificates. Know your parent’s names, mothers' maiden name and places of their birth. If previously married you must show proof of divorce, death or annulment. You need to bring a copy of your final divorce decree if you have divorced within the 90 days through past year (varies by county). Once issued, the license is valid for 90 days. Cost varies, but generally $80, contact your County Clerk’s office for specific information. Ministers must complete the marriage license and return it to the county clerk within 4 days after the marriage.

If either the bride or groom is under 18, at least one of the minor's parents, or legal guardian, must appear with the couple. Certified copies of birth certificates are required. The couple must also schedule an appointment with a counselor and then appear before a superior court judge.

You will also need to request additional copies of your marriage license, if you plan to change your name. You can do so by including the proper paperwork and a check with your license.

And that is it! On the wedding day, the only people that have to do anything with your license are the officiant and witnesses (if public). The wedding couple’s job is done once they leave the clerks office!

Only hiring a month of coordinator? No problem!

When it comes to hiring your wedding planner/coordinator, there are usually a lot of options. You can have a full service coordinator, who can help with your initial venue search, budget creation, all your vendors, and your overall wedding day vision.

Then, you have a partial planner. Someone who is a bit more hands on, but you as the wedding couple will still do about ~50% of the wedding planning work.

And then, you have a month of coordinator— once 90% of the work is done, this person will iron out all the details, tie together all the loose ends, and ensure everything you have planned is executed.

And yes- I am not mentioning a “day of coordinator” because y’all know how I feel about this! A day-of coordinator does NOT exist, and a vendor who claims they are is new and does not know what a wedding entails!!! Okay, off my soap box.

If you are hiring a month of coordinator, this means you are doing a majority of the planning. Here are a few tips to best utilize your month of coordinator and to help make your wedding planning a breeze.

Vet your Vendors!

Ensure your vendors have reviews on multiple sites, come as a referral, or are from a preferred vendor list. MAKE SURE they have a contract you can sign!

When communicating with vendors, be sure you can give accurate arrival times

Make sure you are aware when vendors can arrive to the venue to set up. You also need to take in to account the timing for your photographer and videographer— are you doing a first look? will you be doing a send-off? Be sure to think critically about your timing— if you are not sure, ASK!

Communicate with your vendors efficiently

I get it, you are probably working a full time job AND planning a wedding- not easy! It can be helpful to dedicate one time a week to sit down and do wedding stuff. It can be overwhelming for vendors when you hit a spontaneous wedding planning session and we get emails and texts in multiple threads at 10pm… and then we don’t hear from you for weeks. It can be helpful to keep communications in the same threads, CC other vendors that need to be in the loop, or set up a time to chat with vendors if you have a few questions! We promise- we would way rather have you ask a question 6 months before the wedding, then have to change your vision a few weeks before!

Always ask, “Okay, so who is going to do that?”

This seems silly, but when planning- you always have to ask who is going to complete what task you have in mind. You bought 300 votives candles— who is going to light them? You want to serve a pre ceremony cocktail-who is going to serve that? It is important to you to have your dogs in the wedding- who is going to look after them? If a vendor cannot complete the task, who will?

Communicate, communicate, communicate

This seems like a no brainer- but I cannot stress communication enough! This is in regards to everyone who will touch your wedding— your vendors, your bridal party, your parents, your guests. Do not, and I cannot stress this enough, ever assume. Unsaid expectations will go unmet— be sure to let people know what you expect of them. Be sure you tell your VIP and bridal party about important dates as soon as you are able. Communicate with your vendors what is important to you. Communicate with your guests important details. No one cares more about your wedding than you— be sure your expectations are communicated!

So, Kendalyn....what about YOUR wedding?

As of 2022, I had had my hand in 700 or so weddings. I had seen all the trends come and go (remember flower crowns?) When it came time to plan my own wedding, I knew eyes would be on me. Anytime I shared I was getting married, people would say things like “Oh, I bet you’ve already got it down” or “wow, pressure is on!” But…they were wrong. I honestly hadn’t updated my Pintrest wedding board since college, and I did not feel any pressure because….well…I know what works. The weddings I remember most are the ones that are filled with what the couple wants. I remember Catherine and Ali cutting the cake before dinner because Cat’s grandmother always said “life is short, eat dessert first”. I remember Katie and Dave not doing a grand entrance because they didn’t want to. I remember Natalie and Jeff playing their favorite college drinking game on the dance floor to get the party started. So, when it came time to plan our wedding, Greg (my husband, obvi) and I had a few unique things that were important to us, vendors we knew we wanted to work with, and a vibe we wanted to achieve. So- if you have ever wondered what a wedding planner’s wedding would be like, you’re in luck! Here are a few highlights of the best day of my life, vendor list at the end!

We made our wedding a whole weekend affair

We got engaged in December 2020. I knew I wanted a spring wedding (couldn’t be college football season, couldn’t be hockey or baseball playoffs….) so April 2022 it was! We picked our actual date on our venue’s availability, and got married on a Saturday. I have seen enough weddings to know that the wedding day is most likely the only time that both of the couple’s VIP people will all be together for a happy occasion. Greg’s friends and my friends had never really mingled, and as his entire family, groomsmen, and part of my bridal party were all traveling, we wanted to make it worth their while. We had our rehearsal the Thursday before the wedding, followed by a casual backyard BBQ at my parent’s house on Friday and I could not have loved it more. Everyone got to meet at the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner, and since we had a chill day planned for the next day, everyone was able to have a drink (or 7) and enjoy being together. The Friday BBQ was a chance for us to all hang out with our closest friends who travelled, and allowed us to relax before the big day! I loved this aspect of our wedding. I did not feel rushed, pressured to hang out with anyone, or obligated to delegate anything, as we had already rehearsed!

Something Old, Something Borrowed, Something New, Something Blue

If there is a time to be extra, it is your wedding day!!

If you know me, you know I love my people. I have a very small family, so my friends have always been my sistas. I’m talking at my house on Thanksgiving, presents under the Christmas tree- family. So, as one of the most important things a bride needs on her wedding day, my girls were my something blue! I loved the mismatched look of the dresses in photos- and I loved that I was able to incorporate the most important gals in my life! And yes- that made 14 gals in my bridal party…. sorry, not sorry!

Breakfast for dinner!

Enough said. We had a brunch buffet for dinner- as per Greg’s request. I’m talking chicken and waffles, hashbrowns, eggs (real ones, not powdered), pastries… again- another nod to something that we LOVE, breakfast!

Here is a sneak peak into our day:

Pleasepleaseplease PLEASE get a videographer! Literally, the greatest investment!

And of course, the dream team that made it happen:

Venue: Wedgewood Weddings Sterling Hills 

Florist: Sweet Peas Flowers & Gifts 

DJ: DJ Pablo with DJP Entertainment 

Coordination: All Occasions Event Planning 

Photographer: Katie Hunter 

Videographer: The Sure Shot

Photobooth: GTZ Entertainment 

My dress: BHLDN

Bridesmaids dresses: Birdy Grey 

Cocktail Napkins: Rubi + Lib

Signage and paper goods: Dakota Spencer 

Ceremony and cocktail hour guitarist: Conner Cherland

So, you want to plan a wedding.....

These days, it seems wedding trends change so drastically— one year huge weekend celebrations with 200+ guests, welcome drinks, day after brunch/excursions are expected. Then the next, couples are eloping with their immediate family, followed by a lowkey dinner and photos. Whether you are going big or modest, there are a few things that every couple should keep in mind. Unsure what those things are? Lucky for you, I am basically your wedding planning BFF, so I have complied the top things you need to think about whether you are saying “I Do” at a campground, a cliffside, a ballroom, a golf course, your backyard, or a barn.

Sign a contract!

It does not matter if it is your venue, your friend who will be your make up artist, your DJ….sign. a. contract. Get verbal agreements in writing, even if it is a friend doing you a favor. God forbid something happens, but a verbal agreement with no proof does not hold up. On the topic of contracts….sign a contract before making any payments!

You don’t need to order Save the Dates and invitations for every guest

You are most likely mailing these things to households and couples…. if you have a guest list of 120, I would expect you to actually be sending out 70 or so Save the Dates and invitations! Before you order these, look at your guest list to see how many you actually need!

Speaking of Save The Dates, be sure to include your names, the city of your wedding, the date, and your wedding website!

A note on rentals….

If you are getting married somewhere where you need to provide rentals (think tables, chairs, linens, flatware, etc) there are a lot of logistics that go in to this. A skilled coordinator will help tremendously with this, but while you are getting quotes and trying to get prices a few things to consider:

• When can your rentals be dropped off and picked up? If your wedding is a Saturday, will the venue allow for a Friday drop off, and Monday pick up? Or do items need to be picked up the night of? Usually there is a price difference based on the day of delivery/pick up. Be sure to ask your venue about this!

• Are you renting chairs? Do you need to rent one set for the ceremony, and another set for the reception? Or can you rent one chair set and have staff move them? If going with the latter- who will move them?

• Always always ALWAYS order 2-3 extra of everything. Your guest count is 113? Order 115 of whatever the item is. Things break, an extra guest may show up, better to have it and not need it that need it and not have it!

• When renting plates and flatware- don’t forget about your vendors! Ask your caterer if they provide disposals for vendor meals, or if you need to rent plates for them as well.

Pick a vendor team you respect, trust, and- most importantly- like

“Clicking” with your vendors is crucial. Be sure to select vendors who you know will be there for you on your big day, who will stand up for you and who will be someone who want around you on your biggest day. By the end of the wedding planning process, you will be excited for your wedding day and you will want to be surrounded with people who will gas you up! If you love someone’s work but you don’t “click”- there is no shame on finding another vendor! But if you do go in another direction….

…Please don’t ghost your vendors while you are shopping!

If you reach out to a vendor and decide to go in another direction, please let us know! I love to know why someone doesn’t pick me. Was I out of budget? Did they pick a friend instead? Are they a Dodger fan so can’t tolerate the fact that I am a die-hard Angels fan? Did we just not “click”? Whatever the reason- please let vendors know you are not considering them if you have been chatting!

When making your initial budget, don’t forget tips!

I know- this can be awkward. But depending on how many vendors you have, you should set aside $500-$1,500 for tips. If you aren’t planning on this, it can be a huge surprise at the end of planning!

And last but not least- the #1 thing I tell every single client…

This is YOUR day. Do what makes YOU happy. Don’t want a garter toss but want to toss the bouquet? Go off sis! You want to do a first look then mingle with guest for the cocktail hour? Do it. You want an intimate ceremony followed by a dinner for 15? Let’s do it! Social media can make it seem like everyone has all the things and everyone had a perfect day— it will be perfect because you are marrying your person! Focus on what celebrates the two of you, and you will have no regrets!